Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Clean Bees

Some insects live in the ground.  Sometimes they make their home in your home turf.  Some such winged bugs have located their hive in an area of lawn between our kitchen window and the driveway.

Since I am in the habit of walking willy-nilly about the yard, I've experienced irritable insects flying up my shirt.  (Hot under the collar does not begin to describe my feelings about this.) 

Some call these creatures ground bees.  Some call them sweat bees.  I call them uppity squatters.

The last straw was trespass on the dogs' water bowl.

Unfortunately, these gals did not stop by and eat the bees.  Thus, some other method of debeement was called for.


Throw a Tarp on the Problem 

This method is supposed to kill the bees softly.  You sneak out after dark when all the bees have retired to their slumber room deep in the hole.  You place the tarp over the hole, lay some heavy object(s) on top of the tarp.  Flee the scene.

The theory is, come morning when the bees awaken and attempt to leave the nest, they will be unable to get out and smother under the tarp.  Doesn't really sound like it'll work, does it?

It didn't work.  The industrious bees dug through the grass under the tarp till they reached the edge of the tarp.  Off they flew.  They couldn't get back under the tarp to go back into their hole, however. 

Soon, a mob of agitated bees amassed.  They flew round and round above the tarp.  More and more bees joined the air queue, creating a state a major unrest.

The tarp method only made things worse.

Clean Them to Death

This method is supposed to poison the bees without using scary dangerous poison.  Basically, you pour some soap down their hole.  It so happens, since our new house has no dishwasher, there was a nearly full box of dishwasher soap on hand, yearning to be used.  I dumped a whole bunch of the dishwasher soap down the hole.  A great deal of soap powder remained near the opening of the hole.  The bees continued to come and go -into the hole and out of the hole. 

The next day some powder could still be seen around the entrance of the hole.  The bees continued to come and go. 

The day after that, the powder was gone.  The bees continued to come and go -into the hole and out of the hole.

Several days passed.  The bees continue to come and go.  Yesterday I mopped the floors in the house.  Afterwards, I dumped the bucketful of dirty Spic n Span water into the hole.

Today, the bees continue to come and go -into the hole and out of the hole.

They are still uppity squatters.  All that has changed is they are clean uppity squatters.

To be continued, surely.


  1. I gave up and bought wasp and hornet spray.

    1. It'll probably come to that. Clean with Extreme Prejudice.

  2. I had a colony take up in my citrus trees I would have left them there but it was too close to the house. So I had a bee keeper come round them up and take them to a new home.
    But mine where in a tree so I assume easier to relocate.
    Good Luck

    cheers, parsnip

  3. I think uppity squatters suits them best!

  4. I'd give up and let them be. If they're pollinators, they're doing some good. Just avoid the vicinity.

  5. Pollinators?!? We eat meat! Got that Billy! Send in some ground chuck. And what the hell is that large green noisy thing that buzzes our hole? We'll eat that, too. and who is squatting on our land, deary?

    1. Yes Colony, I know you are meat eaters. I stomped on one of you bugs. About three seconds later, one of his tough guy brethren was eating on the dismembered corpse.

      That green thing that keeps buzzing your hole? His name is John Deere and unless you stay out of my shirt and out of my dogs' water bowl - forget ground chuck. You striped ground dwelling vermin will be ground bees.

    2. Oh, yeah! We're so tough we eat our own. #OccupySanford
      We even poop on dog water dishes.
      -Bees that Occupy

    3. You truly are Occupiers. You defecate on things that merit respect.

      Thus, in the immortal words of Bugs Bunny, "of course you know, this means war".

  6. Poop? Did some one mention poop? Where?