Friday, October 18, 2019

This is No Halloween Skeleton

Sometimes you find things here at the homestead that are well, disturbing.

Like this for instance.

This was smack in the middle of a path.  (Best guess, based on the bones, skull, teeth and a little bit of hair left on the head, these are the remains of a skunk.)

What else lies on the path?

Monday, September 23, 2019

Pop Culture Frenzy, Round 81

Welcome once again to Pop Culture Frenzy. A Dutch fashion designer has come up with a fabric that is bio friendly and earth saving.

What is this fabric made of?

Dog hair?

Hostmaster:  incorrect.


Hostmaster:  huh?

Well, they use hemp to make fabric.  
Maybe they could make a dress out of crystal meth. 
 Like that blind woman on Star Trek.

Hostmaster:  stay away from that stuff, man.  It'll kill you.


Hostmaster:  incorrect.

Cow manure.

Hostmaster:  correct.  It isn't clear how exactly this guy does it.  But he separates the liquid from the solid in the cow flop. Then he extracts the acid from the liquid and the cellulose from the solid and whips it into fabric.

Does it smell?

Hostmaster:  it's purported not to.

What do they do with the
 left over liquid and solid?

Hostmaster:  surely concerned thinkers are working night and day to reprocess those cow poop remnants.

They better hurry.  I hear there are only a
 couple years left before we all die.

Greenhouse gases are dangerous. 
 Cow methane is the main reason for global warming.

If they're making clothes out of cow manure,
 doesn't that mean they'll need live cows? 
 If cows are the main reason for global warming
 is it an environmentally sound idea
 to raise cows for the fashion industry?

There's lots of feces on the streets of San Francisco. 
 Maybe they could use that!

The homeless people could model 
the clothes they helped produce!

It's a win-win!

You guys are sick.

This round is over.

Round 81
Fluffy/Molly   39
Bryan/Cyndi   38

What to know more about turning poop into clothes?  Click Alchemy.

Saturday, September 14, 2019

My Computer went Kaput

Email addresses.  GONE.  Collection of critter pictures.  GONE.
Important assorted whatnot.  GONE.

We have carbonite to retrieve the files.  Probably.  A few years ago when this happened most of the files were saved.  They arrived out of order though.  My procrastination is such that I never organized them.  Therefore they will likely come back this time further disorganized, possibly to the point of being unrecognizable.

You might say I'm feeling frazzled.   Actually, it's worse than that. I'm stifling a scream.  Maybe I'll just let it rip.  Like Edvard Munch.  You know the one.  Here's my version.

Of course, the program that goes with the scanner that allows you to rotate and crop an image refuses to merge with the new computer.  This is just the sort of thing that threatens to render my art less powerful.

Luckily The Handsome One is on hand to assist in this ordeal/transition. His temperament is less inclined to scream than mine.  At least, I've never heard him scream.  Perhaps THO employs a manly method of venting like sitting in his truck and growling.

Wish us luck!

Monday, September 2, 2019

Happy Labor Day

So, it's Labor Day.

Yep.  The Labor Movement won
better treatment and the work day
was reduced to eight hours.

So to celebrate there's big sales
and workers in stores have  to
work overtime.

It's now OK to wear
white though.

Saturday, August 24, 2019

Walk Boldly and Carry a Small Stick

It is a daily routine here at the homestead to walk around the grounds.

Due to increased spider webbage this time of year, I carry a skinny stick which I wave in front of me as we move along.  This reduces the number of web hits to the face.

It's amazing how high and invisible some of those webs are.  Anyway, every action has a reaction.  My walking companions are not excepted from this rule.

Clover seems put off by my behavior -leery even.  Lily seems indifferent.  Henry remains inner focused.

You're marching around like a crazed majorette and you expect nobody to notice?!

Nothing you do surprises me anymore.

Can I have that stick when you're done with it?

Thursday, August 22, 2019

PETA is Cracked

You wouldn't think PETA could possibly come up with ever goofier remarks yet they do.

Here's one.  Some months ago they bought billboard space in San Jose, CA that reads, "Face it, you can't claim to be a feminist and still eat eggs. Eggs and dairy are a product of the abuse of females."

PETA is asking that we, especially "strong women"  go vegan in solidarity with female animals who are being "sexually abused".

We must not participate in the vicious practice of sexual exploitation.  It's eggsploitation!

Sorry PETA.  I lay eggs because I have eggs to lay.  The duck keeper takes my egg away, I move on.  If you want to be scandalized, you go ahead.  I'm not interested in your "rallying cry to stand up to all kinds of systemic abuse" hogwash.

And another thing.  Stop milking this nonsense.  We aren't vegans.  Why should you be?  You aren't somehow supporting us by changing your diet.  Go bother someone else with your fantastical outrage.

This rant brought to you by Bad Dog Ranch.

Thursday, August 15, 2019

Your Dog Knows When You're Coming Home

Many dogs get antsy just before their owner is due to come home.  How do they know?

Do they hear your car?

Do they notice how long you are usually gone and have a way to count the hours?  Maybe observe the movement of sun and shadows?

Do they have a sixth sense about it?

Here's an interesting theory:  smell.  Your scent lingers after you leave.  It fades with the hours. Your dog notices how much it had faded concurrent with your reappearance.  Thus, when your scent has diminished to a certain level, your dog knows you'll be back soon.

That's more likely than the dog reading the clock on the microwave, isn't it?

Wait just a darn minute!  Check this out!  Maybe it's ESP.  Go to 6:39  here=>      When everything else is ruled out....

Sunday, August 4, 2019

Pop Culture Frenzy, Round 80

Welcome once again to Pop Culture Frenzy.  Today we are talking about biological weapons in the United States.  Recently, the House ordered the Pentagon to investigate possible secret government experiments done from 1950 through 1975.

What sort of biological weapons were they working on?

Making bombs out of porcupine quills?

Hostmaster:  incorrect.  That would make some nasty shrapnel.

Taking the contents of port-a-potties and shooting
 them from a high pressure hose?

Hostmaster: ew.  No.

Replacing vaccinations with
scorpion venom?

Hostmaster:  hmmm.

Poison mushrooms sprinkled on donuts?

You still trying to kill cops?
 I thought you quit Antifa.

Shut up, Bryan.
  You are the poster boy of toxic masculinity.

Why thank you.

The government should figure out how
to harness toxic masculinity.  Then there
would be peace in the world!

Such peace would cause a feminist uprising.

Hostmaster:  true that.

Squirrels armed with nuts?

Hostmaster:  incorrect.

Putting poison ivy oil
in bubble bath?

Hostmaster: incorrect.  It was ticks.  They want to know if the government was experimenting with  diseased ticks for use as a weapon.

  Maybe when those LSD tests
 didn't pan out they dipped
 into the leftovers.  

This is serious.
Lyme disease is no joke.

I smell a conspiracy theory.

Remember folks.  Check yourself for ticks
 after a stroll through the grass.

It's a gas.  

I can dig it.

Round 80

Fluffy/Molly 39
Bryan/Cyndi  37

Read about it here and here, unless the link gets rendered too secret!