Saturday, October 31, 2015

Fluffy and George on Jack-o'-Lanterns


The U.S. Dept. of Energy
claims that jack-o'-lanterns
are contributing to global

Let me guess.
All those little candles
inside the pumpkins
burning at the same time
super heat the earth.
No. Pumpkins decaying in
landfills make methane which
is now considered more dangerous
than carbon dioxide.
So you can't compost them.
  Because of methane.
  Can't eat them.
Yep.  More dangerous
than greenhouse gas.
We seem to be painted
into a corner.
Good thing the
globe is round.

Thursday, October 15, 2015

Pop Culture Frenzy, Round 39

Welcome once again to Pop Culture Frenzy.  Today's question involves the whereabouts of a snake named Elvis.  Some Floridian harboring a death wish has been harboring a Cobra.  On or about September 1st the Cobra escaped.

A couple days later, snake boy reported the missing Cobra.  Soon, folks in Orlando tread with trepidation, school children were denied recess.  Snake fear specifically, and in general, reached new heights thanks to a guy who let his highly venomous pet go on walkabout. 

About a month later, the Cobra turned up and was corralled by animal control. Where was the snake finally found?


Behind the wheel of a Ford Cobra?
Hostmaster:  incorrect. 
In the company of a gang of sewer alligators?
Hostmaster:  incorrect.
In a child's backpack?
Hostmaster:  incorrect.  You have to wonder if this guy will get in trouble for endangering people and inconveniencing children.  He was charged by the Florida Fish and Wildlife Commission for waiting more than two days before reporting the snake missing.  He has pled not guilty.  If it goes to trial, perhaps Elvis will be called as a character witness.
Where was the snake called Elvis found?
Working in a pet store in Kalamazoo?
Hostmaster:  incorrect.
Hiding in a squirrel's nest? 
Hostmaster:  incorrect.
In a laundry basket waiting
 to be charmed out of a pile of clothes?
Hostmaster:  close enough.
Here's what happened.  A woman living about a half mile from where Elvis the Cobra escaped, was doing some laundry in her garage.  She heard a curious hissing sound.  Upon investigation, she discovered the missing snake coiled and annoyed under her dryer.
Animal control officers caught the snake but it was too large for their snake cage so they put it in a cat cage.  Elvis is said to be somewhere between 8 and 10 feet in length.
So ends another round of Pop Culture Frenzy.
Round 39 
Fluffy/Molly  17
Bryan/Cyndi   15

Friday, October 9, 2015

They Found Me

There are many things about living in suburbia that I do not miss.  For instance, the common occurrence whereby a car stuffed with people parks on the street. The people pile out.  After a brief huddle, they break into pairs and each pair heads off in a different direction.

That's right.  Jehovah Witnesses doing their thing.

Now that I am living rural, I figured the JW wouldn't bother bothering me anymore.

Not so.

Even though my house is some distance from the road, indeed, is barely visible from the road, still they came.  A car stuffed with people. 

I saw the car and went out to see who they were.  The car was pulling away.  A young man in the passenger seat told me they left me a pamphlet.

Sure enough.  There was a pamphlet on the back porch.  "Where can we find answers to life's big questions?" asks the pamphlet in bold letters.

On the next page, you are invited to visit the JW web site for the answers.  JW don't even bother to talk to us non JWs anymore.  They've got a website!  Must be quite the time saver.

The car stuffed full of JWs drove away before I could ask each one of them for their home address.

I was thinking of showing up uninvited at each of their homes and leaving a Rosary on their back porch.

Saturday, October 3, 2015

Day Laborers

There are many grasshoppers and crickets and spiders to be eaten. 

It's a big job.  The staff can barely keep up.
Some neighbor ducks came over to help out.
This turkey work crew came out of the woods.
Later, the neighbor ducks headed back across the road.
The turkeys went back into the woods. 
The staff went to the break room.