Sunday, September 15, 2024

They Tried to Warn Me

  


We all know that our world is full of germs, most of which you encounter on your kitchen counter.  Naturally, I’m concerned about the health and safety of my family.  Experts tell us that that sponge you use to wash dishes is not nice and clean from all that cleansing dish soap. 

That sponge is actually a vast growing medium for legions of dangerous pathogenic bugs.  Some people use a dish cloth instead.  They toss it in the wash machine after every use, or so they say.  Sure, you’re washing that cloth in hot water.  That ought to get it clean. Trouble is, you’re putting it in with other items that are also washed in hot water.  You know, like underwear.  After that, it’s clean enough to eat off of?  Or rub against things you’re going to eat off of?

Never mind, I prefer a sponge.  The size and girth of a sponge is simply superior for the job of washing dishes. Still, there’s the problem of how to clean the sponge.





Do Not put sponge in microwave!  That’s what the label on my favorite sponge four pack brand says.  It doesn’t say why.  I’ve wondered about that, but never deeply.  I developed a system for keeping the dangerous bugs off my sponges.  After washing the dishes, I would wring the sponge out (to the dampness of a perfect compost pile) and place it in the microwave.  I cannot recall how I came upon the ideal number of seconds to do the proper job of sanitizing the sponge, but it was under one minute.  

Foreshadow Alert!

Then we got a new microwave.  I hadn’t yet figured out how to make it run for a specific number of seconds so I just pressed GO and waited till the countdown of seconds reached the correct number, at which point I would open the microwave door and remove the sponge.  That worked fine till one day I pressed GO, then wandered away.

 A minute later, the microwave beep beep beeped to proclaim that where there is smoke, there is fire.  I opened the microwave door to dreadful smelling smoke and flames rising from the half gone blackened sponge.  I pulled the plate thing out of the microwave and carried the hostile festive sponge flambe’ onto the back porch and tossed it on the grass.  It kept burning till I flipped the plate thing over it.  Later, examining the carnage, it was clear that at least three quarters of the sponge had, well, melted away.




It was a new sponge too.  A purple one.  

Sunday, August 25, 2024

Some Trail Camera Stuff!





Lily on point.




Henry after berry picking.  For some reason, he looks crazed.  Maybe it's because Lynn doesn't share.  




Dove Head with Distant Flowerpot




Deer contemplating a home invasion?




Mighty Buck 

Monday, July 22, 2024

Exciting News!

 

An excerpt of my novel is featured in the Penmen Review.







Sunday, July 21, 2024

It's July

 Warm enough for Malcom to be outside.


The harvest is going strong: squash and peas and beans, tomatoes soon.  



We've had some nice wild mulberries and raspberries and blackberries this year.  Now the boysenberries are getting ripe!

Of course, there is still mowing to be done in summer.  



It's hot and hilly but the groundskeeper is unafraid.





Thursday, June 20, 2024

GWEN


Ever hear of the G W E N system?  Those tower things that emit a low frequency sound?  They were purportedly set up in 1982 to communicate with those remaining after a nuclear attack or something else terrible.  You know, just in case.  Survivors would need to, you know, be informed.

But isn't it running all the time?  Wouldn't it HAVE to be?  You know, you never know when a big terrible will come.


Two attempts to post a picture of a GWEN Tower were thwarted....by whom....and why?



Anyway.  There is one of these things not far from the Bad Dog Ranch.  A scant forty miles away, it is constantly sending messages.


GWEN is perpetually beaming.  


And now it is violently present at my front window!  A local sparrow has been literally attacking the windows of my home for over a week.  He flies to the window, pecks at the glass, all while peering in with a wild light in his eyes.




Here's a picture of a sparrow taken a couple years ago.  



Of course, who's to say the crazed GWEN sparrow isn't a descendant of this seemingly innocent sane sparrow?  But I digress.


The bird should be focused on raising a brood, not bashing his beak against a living room window.  

Who's to say those mysterious ever-present frequencies haven't driven him mad?




Seems to me, you don't have to be a conspiracy theorist to find this whole thing unnerving.  


I don't know about this GWEN theory of hers.                  One thing's for sure, that bird is wacko.








Saturday, June 15, 2024

Meanwhile in the Garden

 The two strawberry plants I put in last year are now about twenty.  Not wanting to share with the many birds and assorted omnivores around here, I encircled the strawberry patch with chicken wire.




Then I saw a baby bunny in the strawberry patch!




I let him off with a warning.




As for the potato bugs- 




no leniency.

A Spring in His Step

Early spring was, well, eventful.




The Handsome One had been having some troubling symptoms.  Eventually it was discovered that his aortic valve was not working properly.  Thus, they opened up his chest and put in a nice sturdy cow valve.



Some two months later, he is feeling better but is also feeling a bit antsy.  





Here he is doing some cardio rehab.




.

He wants to get back to pumping iron.  His pecs took quite a hit.

Monday, March 18, 2024

Spring is in the Air

Well, springish.  It is snowing right now.  March is what you might call a diverse month.



Still, birds are whooping it up out there.



  Soon there will be youngsters and green grass.  




'Tis a time to ponder...